Feet Don’t Fail Me Now…

August 31, 2008


Right brain, left brain…

I have never understood the difference. But I do know that the right side of my body is much more coordinated than the left side.

When dancing my right foot/leg knows all the Fred Astaire moves while my left foot/leg is like the dude on Dancing With The Stars who looks like he is the next best thing to Holland-Clod-Hopping meets Austrian-Soldier-March.

In laymans terms this means I look very silly when dancing…

My right foot and my left foot are always all “get your act together Dude”. They really do fight with each other…

In the meantime, I am trying to be all cool and suave while the two feet are arguing that every once in awhile I have to get off the dance floor to put my two feet in time-out.

And, even in time out, they argue with each other. They complain about wearing each others socks; they tease each other about the difference in size between toes two and three; they needle each other over who can wear a shoe with the least sweatage…

I am unsure what I should do to get me feet  on the same page. I have thought of therapy or a footacologist but I just don’t think that is going to work.

These two guys just really don’t like each other.

I am almost ready to call an intervention but I really don’t think it would help. I don’t think I will ever get these two guys in the same shoe.

Instead, I will go through life as an intermediary between these two podalic mercenaries and wonder why I am so lenient that I let my feet walk all over me…


One comment

  1. People call me “Elaine” from Seinfeld – when I dance… I know the feeling.

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